A Little Taste Of Cupcakes
by bellabambina248
Summary: The dark haired baker needed a visa, and the blond erotic-shop employee needed money. What happens when their paths cross? SasuNaru.
1. Chapter 1, Holy matrimony!

Hi Everyone,

Since Sasuke's Journal is done (although I think some of you want a come back from Naruto), I decided to post this chapter that I've been setting aside for a while now.

This is a new SasuNaru fiction. It starts off a little similar to "A contract with a bastard", but it doesn't stay that was for long. Its light-hearted but with a pinch of angst and heart break.

I hope you enjoy it.

**Chapter 1, "Holy matrimony!" **

The can rolled across the sidewalk as Naruto kicked it once again. With both hands in his pocket, he moaned loudly from frustration. The action was enough to attract his friends' attention.

"You're not having seconds thoughts, are you, buddy?" Kiba asked, racing Naruto to kick the can and winning.

"What if the guy is a perve or some weirdo? He'll have to stay at my place for God knows how long," Naruto puffed his cheeks.

"You asked me how you could make fast money. This is the only legal way I could find," The friend answered, quickly interrupted by Nara's groan.

"Just to be clear, it is not legal," Shikamaru added.

"Semi-legal."

"One hundred percent illegal," Shikamaru corrected again, whispering "troublesome" soon after.

"Well, it's better than dealing drugs or something."

"If you consider fraud and lying on legal documents better, then yes."

"Whatever. He didn't sign the marriage contract yet so Naruto can still go back if he doesn't like the guy once he meets him," Kiba added.

"Did Chouji tell you anything about him? Is he even gay?" Naruto asked, mind still occupied by the decision he was reflecting over.

"Just that he is some big-shot pastry chef from Sunagakure."

"Can't he apply for a work visa or something? Why would he resort to marrying some guy he doesn't know?"

"I think he wants to open his own shop. I don't know. I guess we'll know everything once we meet him tonight," Kiba said, as he and Naruto kicked the can to each other.

Suddenly Shikamaru stepped on the can midway. "Naruto, make sure you don't sign anything without reading it first."

"I get it. I get it," the blond pursed his lips. "Maybe he'll turn out handsome, and we will fall in love," Uzumaki snickered.

"He's probably very feminine, with his line of work and everything," Kiba mumbled. "Did you see the cakes Chouji brings back everyday? They are all pink, cute, and shit like that. A 'dude' can't come up with these things."

"I don't know. I prefer my men buff. All muscles glistening in sweat after working out and benching weights," Naruto ended the sentence with a long moan. "Someone who is fun and always on the go. Down to earth," he tried to imagine the man he was on his way to visit. "But I guess I don't mind if he is feminine, as long as he keeps those cakes coming."

"Here we are," Kiba smiled when they finally arrived at the back door of the pastry shop where Chouji worked. He pulled out his phone and began dialing his friend's number. "He should be out once he sees I'm calling."

The door opened, Chouji walking out with a toque on his head and in white double-breasted jacket, and a whisk in hand. "Hey guys. You're somewhat early. Can you wait twenty minutes till we're done with the batch? We received an order for a bachelorette party last minute."

"Fine," Naruto answered, poking Shika in the stomach mischievously, knowing how ticklish his friend was. "Are we going to meet here later?"

"There is a café across the street. I'll bring him over," Chouji walked back in, but Naruto grabbed him quickly.

"Say," the blond leaned towards Chouji's ear curiously. "What kind of person is he?"

Chouji gulped; he had been working with Sasuke for a while after all. "How can I say this; He is definitely driven." He sugarcoated the truth.

"Does he have a sense of humor?" Naruto's eyes widened like pearls.

The friend laughed nervously. '_Cruel mockery is a type of humor, isn't it?' _Chouji hoped. "Well, he knows how to make a joke."

"He is handsome?"

"Yes!" Chouji almost shouted it out. He was glad he could finally say something without having to sugarcoat his words. "The girls swoon over him. We get tons of school girls everyday who come by just to see him."

Naruto smiled, "Can I peek in?"

Naruto pressed forward, trying to peek through the door. But Chouji forced him away, since he knew if Naruto saw how Sasuke treated his subordinates, he was surely going to run away. It wasn't that Chouji wanted to hide the truth from his friend, and intentionally get him stuck with someone he might be incompatible with. The fact was, he had known Sasuke for almost a year now, and as disagreeable as he was at times, he knew he was an acquired taste. Naruto needed a chance to get to know the Sasuke underneath before writing him off.

"Later. Later."

Naruto slumped his shoulders, as he walked away, dragging Shikamaru from his sleeve. "These are going to be the longest twenty minutes of my life."

"I can't believe you are getting married," Kiba mumbled.

"It's a sham marriage. I just want to pay pervy grandpa's debt. I don't want some loan shark breaking his legs."

"It is still a marriage."

"I always thought Shikamaru would get married first," Naruto turned around to look at his friend. "You always talked about how much you wanted to marry a guy who is not too hot or too ugly. Have two kids, and then-"

"We should set you up with someone," Kiba interrupted. "How long has it been since you got laid?"

"Stop talking about these things," Shikamaru's face turned red, as he choked and turned away. "What a drag."

"I thought we could set you up with Shino," Kiba spoke about his flat-mate. "You already hang out with him when you are at my place. But you said you hate bugs, and he's really into them. He has twenty pet spiders. I'm afraid to go into his room."

Naruto suddenly froze in his step, "How about the redhead who lives in my building?"

"He's scary," Kiba shook his head in disapproval. "But I guess he might be wild in bed."

"Stop it," Nara coughed, face even a deeper shade of red. "I don't need you to set me up. Just look after yourselves first."

"Suit yourself," Kiba pushed the door to the café, before walking in and choosing a table right in the center.

"We should sit in a corner, so the conversation can be kept private," Shikmaru added. Kiba hissed. He liked to be in charge, but he figured he could take a back seat for once.

In exactly thirty minutes, Chouji walked in, followed by a stunning slim guy with skin the color of cream and eyes the color of night. The man smelled of vanilla and cake, enough for Naruto to feel hungry the minute the man stepped in.

"Is that him?" Kiba whispered. "He's good looking."

Naruto smiled. Sasuke was obviously 'beautiful'. He preferred handsome men, with scars and rough hands, but he couldn't deny that even though he looked somewhat more delicate than he liked, Sasuke was a beauty. Then, Sasuke spoke…

"Tell me it's not the delinquent with the tattoo on his face," Sasuke hissed at Chouji, loud enough for everyone to hear.

"And he's a dick," Shikamaru whispered.

"It's the blond," Chouji laughed timidly.

The three men stared at Sasuke as he sat down in front of them. "I'm Sasuke Uchiha. Chouji should have already told you my situation. To make sure we don't waste each other's time, I'll let you know my conditions in advance; I'll pay 90000 ryos for each year we are married. You'll have to sign an agreement that asserts that you have to stay married to me for at least three years, or until I get my citizenship. My lawyer also prepared a prenub to insure that when we finally divorce, everything will go smoothly. Now, concerning our residence, I don't know where you live, but since you are having financial problems, I'm assuming your place is not that great. So, I think it would be better if we move into my apartment-"

Naruto suddenly got up, and pointed to the others face.

Sasuke stared at the finger pointing at him, "I'm assuming you have something to say."

"You can't burst in here, and start making demands before even giving a chance for other's to introduce themselves. Don't be an asshole, you bastard! Didn't anyone teach you how to have basic conversation?!"

Sasuke furrowed his brows, "I'll let you know; my offer is very generous, and many people would jump at such an opportunity. I don't know what game you are playing to try and bargain, but it's not going to work."

"Fuck you," Naruto grit his teeth, and began to walk away. "Guys, we are leaving."

"Just! Naruto wait!" Chouji got up and began to chase after Naruto, who had already walked out of the coffee shop.

"Chouji, don't even try! He's a bastard! I can't live with someone like that for three years!" Naruto waved his hands in the air, his gestures almost wilder than his anger.

"He is not a bad guy."

"Are you kidding me? Did you meet him?!"

"He is just aloof, but once you get used to each other-"

"He treats you like a lacky! He called Kiba a delinquent!"

"He's my boss, Naruto," Chouji sighed, panting from the chase.

"I'm sorry I got you involved in this. I don't want to get you in trouble with your boss, but he's a horrible person."

"You don't know him well enough."

"He-"

"The Naruto I know knows that the first impressions people assume about someone are usually wrong. How many people misunderstood you and misjudged you before?"

Naruto puffed, "You're right. I'll go back, but he's on probation."

"Thank you."

The blond stomped back to the table, sat down arms crossed and face scowling. "I have conditions too."

"Which are?" Sasuke raised both eyebrows.

"It's 95000 a year. First year in advance. You will pay for all the house expenses since you were the one who wants to stay at his place. And my friends can come over whenever I want," Naruto stared Sasuke in the eye. He didn't want to be a crude about his demands, but since the other man started it first, he decided two could play that game.

"Fine, as long as you don't wake me up during the night or trash the place. But I'm not running a hang out for your friends and you," Sasuke stated. "You understand that we will have to learn a lot about each other, and in front of everyone except the five of us on this table, we are genuinely married. So it's more than just memorizing answers about my favorite color." Sasuke frowned. Naruto was too loud. Too loud for his taste. It also seemed that the boy had a knack for trouble, but he was the only one he could find who came with a testimonial from a person he somewhat trusted, Chouji.

"I understand. Do you think I am an idiot or something?!"

Sasuke glared at the other man, "You should know I don't like loud voices."

"You should know I don't like your face!" Naruto raised his voice up ten notches in defiance.

"Sasuke, why are you doing this? We were discussing it earlier; wouldn't it be easier for you to get a work visa," Shikamaru interrupted, half trying to watch for Naruto's interest, half trying to get Naruto's screaming to stop. "Plus, from my understanding, you have already lived here for a year. In four years, you could apply for citizenship."

"Yes, but I would have to stay employed until then, and I would like to start my own business early on," Sasuke explained, glad that someone was finally talking reasonably. "My work is a very important part of my life and-"

Sasuke turned around and flashed Naruto, who was sniffing his shoulder, a death glare. "What are you doing?"

"You smell like vanilla," Naruto's words faded. "And something else. Is it nut meg?"

Sasuke blinked a few times, before looking back to Shikamaru and ignoring Naruto, "And I already have a plan for my shop. I already made an offer on a place downtown."

"Do you want to fuck Naruto?" Kiba asked loudly, before being jabbed in the side by Shikamaru.

"What Kiba means to say; are you expecting to consummate the marriage with Naruto? Since this might affect how-"

"No!" Naruto quickly added. "I'm never sleeping with him!"

Sasuke glared at him once more, before inhaling deeply, "I don't expect anything like that from him. However, the under the contract, he cannot have a relationship or sleep with anyone else for the duration of our marriage. As I mentioned, as far as everyone else is concerned, we are in a real marriage, so we have to watch our image."

Kiba fell back against the back of his chair, "So basically Naruto is going to have blue balls for the next three years. That sucks."

"What if I meet someone else?" Naruto asked, a little concerned.

"You've to honor your commitment. I will too."

The blond hissed, staring down at the band around his wrist, with the inscription "Be proud of who you are". Jiraiya had bought it for him years back, when he first came out. It wasn't enough that he took care of him after his parents' death, but he was also more understanding and supportive than most of his friends' parents. He had heard horror stories about coming out, but Jiraiya let him know that he was fine as long as Naruto was happy. It was time for him to pay his grand pa back, Naruto figured. "I guess love can wait three years," he whispered.

"Are you sure, Naruto?" Shikamaru asked, concern in his voice, and then whispered, "We can try to get the money some other way."

"We already tried," Naruto spoke with a composed voice, some pain seeping out every once in a while. "Plus, the debt is getting larger everyday with the huge interest. We won't be able to pay it if we wait."

The blond then nodded, "So, when are we going to do this."

"Monday at my lawyers office, we will sign all the documents. We can then go to the registrar's office and finalize the marriage."

The blond nodded, and watched as Sasuke pulled his wallet out. "Take this and buy a tuxedo. I'll bring a camera, and make a reservation somewhere. Invite a few close friends. We need to make it seem legit for our interview afterwards."

Naruto reached for the money, "When am I going to move in?"

"As soon as possible. You should move your things into my place by Sunday. Luckily, I'm very private, so I don't think my neighbors will be suspicious if I suddenly get married." he explained. "As for the interview, I did some research. It takes at least a month or two before everything is set, so we have some time to practice our answers. We also have to come up with a story to tell your neighbors and friends; incase they interview them as well."

"That might be hard to do," Shikamaru stated. "Naruto is very open, but I guess we can try to make it seem like a spontaneous decision. That would be more believable."

**XXXX On Sunday XXXX**

The raven stood at Naruto's door step with a composed face, trying his best to avoid having a mini heart attack. Was Naruto going to turn his place into a dump like this one? It was possible, right? He though, body shuddering at the though.

"Hey, Sasuke. Naruto is packing the living room," Kiba passed by him carrying a box labeled 'Manga'.

The raven dipped his head, before walking inside as if walking to his death. Once he reached the living room, he noticed Naruto climbing the couch, trying to get down some posters on the wall behind it.

"Hey, you're finally here," Naruto smiled. "Take off your shoes, come up and help me."

The raven complied sourly. The ground was completely covered in junk, but he managed to hop from one empty spot to the other till he made it to the couch. "You don't plan on putting these posters up at my place?"

Naruto turned around and stared at the man, "Why not?"

Sasuke bit his lip, trying to convince himself to let it go, and let the boats sails in calm waters for now. "They don't go well with my décor," he tried to be polite about it.

"I think they are fun."

Sasuke took another look at the cartoon character on the poster, "Well, sure, if you are five. But you are not five."

"I'll let you know; people of all ages watch Gintama!"

"It's a cartoon."

"It's not a cartoon. It's an anime!"

The Uchiha sighed. He had heard this statement before, and he knew the conversation wasn't going to lead anywhere. "Fine, but only hang them in the closet."

"Fine," Naruto hissed, before tossing the first poster to Sasuke.

In a matter of a few minutes, Sasuke was carrying fifteen posters. It almost seemed impossible that the wall had fitted all of these earlier. He stepped of the couch, and instantly yelped. He closed his eyes, trying to get over the pain in his foot, and the irritation in his mind.

"Why do you have toys all over the floor?"

"They are called figurines."

"Then don't toss them all over the floor," he raised his leg up, and checked to see if the 'figurine' had broken skin. "And you still play with legos too?" He pulled a lego piece off the ground and then tossed it away.

"I make art with them. Get off my back!"

Living with that guy was going to be impossible, Sasuke whined. It was all for his ambition. He should endure, he repeated silently. But honestly, how could he live with a man like Naruto? Fire wouldn't be able to live in the same container as water. No, a better metaphor would be Flame and gasoline.

"This is the last room before I'm done packing," Naruto explained, holding up yet another poster.

These were going to be the longest three years of his life, Sasuke hissed.

**Should I continue?**

**Should Naruto say "I do"? **


	2. Chapter 2, Persuasive Bastard

**Chapter 2, "Persuasive Bastard"**

Later that day, Sasuke took Naruto for a little tour around his house. The blond was curious by nature, and just like a baby; he had to touch everything that caught his interest. Sasuke on the other hand was somewhat shaken and irritated by the fact. Naruto's hands had been all over his stuff, and he was a loner by habit; he had lived alone for years after all. He figured it was evitable that he would have to share everything with the blond, but it was still going to need some getting used to.

"And this is where the knives and forks are kept," he opened the drawer and then closed it promptly. He wanted to get this tour over and done with already.

"What is this?" Naruto reached out and pressed the biggest button on one machine. He jumped back when a loud voice suddenly roared from the gadget.

"That's a kitchen machine. How can you not know that?"

"How about this?" He twisted the knob, before having his hand swatted away.

"Espresso machine. Stop touching."

"Hey! Who are you swatting at? Do you think I'm a fly or something?"

"These are expensive, and the kitchen is my territory. Understood. It's my territory."

Naruto rolled his eyes, "Fine, next thing you'll be marking it with- Fridge!" The blond heaved the fridge's door open, tilted his head to the side, and began to examine the contents, "Where are all the sweets?"

"I see enough sweets at work. I try to eat healthy at home," Sasuke pointed to the bottom drawer in the fridge, "fruits and vegetables are in there."

"If I were you, I'd eat cake day and night. And ramen."

Sasuke sighed. He figured he was going to tell Naruto more about himself sooner or later. "I don't like sweets. But if you are hungry, I'm preparing tomato basil soup and garlic bread. Don't expect me to be your private chef from now on though."

The blond looked at Sasuke in suspicion, eyes narrowed. "You are a pastry chef. How can you not like sweets?"

"I have my motives."

"That doesn't make sense."

"We'll talk about it later."

"You're not a masochist, are you?" Naruto eyed Sasuke as if the man had just broken out of mental institution. "Is it a Suna thing? Do you have some sort of a complex?"

Sasuke sighed; Naruto's imagination was running wild. "My older brother is a pastry chef as well."

"So you are following in your big brother's foot steps? That's cute," Naruto smiled; mind finally at ease.

"Actually, I plan to-" Sasuke paused. "Let me show you the bedroom first."

"You plan to what?" Naruto ran after Sasuke.

"I plan to prove that I'm better than him at it."

"Sibling rivalry, then. I don't have a brother, but I get it. I compete with Kiba all the time."

"It is more than just that," he murmured, before pointing at the couch. "There is only one bedroom, but this is a sofa bed, so we don't have to sleep next to each other. It is quite comfortable."

"Don't you two get along?"

"Lets not fixate on this issue now."

"What if they ask me in the interview?!" Naruto whined. Deep down, he was just curious.

"Fine," Sasuke snorted. "My brother has always enjoyed out-doing me at everything. My father believed him to be a genius. He couldn't even see me when Itachi was around. He was his heir; I was the backup he was never going to need. Suddenly, Itachi decided to go to confectionary school rather than inherit the business empire."

"Oh, so you were upset you were stuck running the family business?"

"I wanted to run the family business."

"That's good then-"

"But I don't want to run it just because he refused to. I'm not a spare-tire. So, I made my calculations; if I open my own store in the next month, and follow the marketing plan I prepared, my shop should be rivaling his in a year. You see, he has the advantage for now, because he already established the customer base, and I will need time to bring them over to my store," Sasuke explained, completely consumed by his own thoughts. "I give it a couple of years, and see how he likes it when he comes in second. Then I can go back to the family business."

Sasuke finally noticed how Naruto was staring at him with an open jaw. He pursed his lips, swallowed somewhat self-conscious, and returned to his tour, "Anyway, I emptied the left side of the closet for you-"

"So you are doing something you don't like, even committing fraud, just because you want to spite your brother?"

Suddenly, Sasuke's tone was serious again, "I want to prove he's not better than me."

"What's the use if you are better than him at something you don't want to do. You won't be happy."

"I will never be satisfied knowing I come second to him. It's unfair; I always work twice as hard as he does."

Naruto pursed his lips, knowing he was about to stick his nose into someone else's private matters, "It seems like it's your father's fault for not appreciating you, not your brother's."

"Hn."

"Hey, don't look at me like that. I'm just saying what I think-"

"Well, it is none of your business, is it?"

"If I'm going to be your husband-"

"I don't want the advice of an idiot who managed to sink himself in debt."

"Fuck you, bastard! That was uncalled for! That's not even the truth."

"Why else would you be doing this?"

"For the sake of someone I care about. A family member. You know _family; _the people who try to be there for each other, not humiliate each other."

"You're too naïve, dobe."

"You're the one who is still stuck in a childish competition with his brother, who probably doesn't even care if you beat him or not!"

"Shut up! You don't know what you're talking about or who Itachi is!" Sasuke shouted. He despised raising his voice, but the blond was getting on his nerve.

"I know he's your brother. You should love him, and you should get over it. I would die to have a brother. If I did, I might fight with him occasionally, but I wouldn't dedicate all of my life to try and make him feel inferior to me. I can't believe you don't appreciate the how lucky you are-"

"I can't believe this is our second conversation, and you are already lecturing me about my family matters. You are unbelievable."

"I'm sorry, _honey_, I thought we are getting married tomorrow," Naruto mocked. "Anyway, it's your loss. Be horrible to your brother. I'm not going to let it bother me. I'm not going to try and get you two to reunite and reconnect. Never!"

"Don't!"

"I won't! Plus, I don't know how to contact him."

"You sound like you want to."

"Well if I do, it will be for your brother's sake. Surely not yours, psycho," Naruto huffed. He knew he was being overbearing. He was self-aware, but… He couldn't wrap his mind how Sasuke hated his brother so much, all the while, he spent nights crying and wishing for a brother and a family through out his childhood.

"Try and talk to Itachi, and you will regret it," the raven threatened, voice low and deep.

"I don't respond well to threats, just so you know. I might just invite him to our wedding."

"Don't invite him to the wedding, Naruto."

"Having him attend will make our marriage seem much more legit!" Naruto raised both shoulders. "We should ask him to cater it."

Sasuke gritted his teeth. He just didn't know how to deal with that, that, that 'creature' named Naruto. "How about we call this whole thing off then?"

"Why not. I'll just tell the movers to turn back. No big deal. Lets call it off. You don't have to have your own shop," Naruto challenged.

"And you don't have to help that family member of yours."

"He can live with his legs broken and nose smashed. In fact, he might get some sympathy sex out of it. It will be great, you won't have to break up with your hand."

Sasuke gritted his teeth, "As if I would have wanted anything to do with your ass anyway. I'd probably find Legos in there."

"Very funny. You think you're very funny-" Naruto mocked, face red from fury, and words fast from beckoning a nearing explosion.

"Not as funny as you masturbating to comics-"

"It's Yaoi! And fuck you, it's awesome!"

"It's not real."

"Neither is porn!"

For the next few minutes, Naruto panted as he began to calm down. Sasuke on the other hand, began to chop some onions for his soup. Chopping was somewhat soothing to Sasuke, so was beating the meat with a hammer over and over to tenderize it.

Naruto gulped. He didn't want to be the one to raise the white flag first, but he had already agreed to pay the loan shark his money tomorrow night. "So are we getting married tomorrow or what?"

"Yes."

"Ok…"

"…"

"And I shouldn't invite you brother-"

"No!" The raven blew up, waving the knife in the air.

"Fine. Don't wave the knife in my face. I was just confirming that you don't want him there. You look like a serial killer."

"I don't want him there," Sasuke smiled, a smile reminiscent of American psycho, the movie.

"I won't invite him."

"Great."

"How about your father?"

"I will tell father later. After the marriage has been finalized, or he won't let it go through."

"But wouldn't he want to be at his son's wedding?"

"Are you enjoying this, Naruto?"

"What?"

"Being a pain in the ass."

"I'm trying to help, bastard."

"Can you help by unpacking?"

"Fine. The bookcase was in the room over there, right?"

"Yes."

"Is it okay if I put my manga in there, or are you going to wave your knife in my face again?"

"Go ahead and put whatever you want in there," the raven sighed. He wouldn't have agreed if it was any other time, but Naruto had already consumed all the energy he had that day for fighting.

"That's what she said," Naruto giggled. "Even the yaoi ones?"

"Hn."

Naruto turned around after receiving Sasuke's death glare, "Maybe I'll keep them in a box instead."

Sasuke cracked his neck. Naruto was finally away. Finally. Silence had never sounded so good, Sasuke thought. But immediately, he heard a thunderous sound of books crashing followed by Naruto cursing and yelling.

The raven ran to the room, only to find Naruto on the ground, covered in dozens of books.

"They fell on me," Naruto complained.

Sasuke hissed, before kneeling downs. He began to remove the books from over Naruto before helping him up. "Did you get hurt?"

"The whole case was about to fall on me. Thank God it didn't."

"You should be more careful, dobe. I don't want you to die before I get my citizenship."

"Great, so not only not allowed to have sex for the next three years, I can't die either," Naruto pouted.

"You're getting smarter," Sasuke smirked. "What happened anyway?"

"It just shook on it's own."

"Hn."

"I might have bumped against it by mistake when I realized that I'm getting married tomorrow."

"You just realized that now?"

"And then it hit me, we will need to kiss in public and stuff," Naruto swallowed.

"Don't tell me, I'm going to be your first kiss," Sasuke teased.

Naruto pursed his lips in disgust, "It was a horrible image."

"Hn."

"Would you still kiss me if I had just eaten cake and I smell like it?"

"I think that's enough interaction for one day."

**XXXXX Later than Night XXXXX**

Sasuke struggled to open the sofa bed, pulling it in all the ways he knew how. "It always worked perfectly."

"I'll just sleep on the floor until we fix it."

Sasuke turned and looked at the man. He didn't like Naruto, but he knew he would feel guilty if he slept on the bed while the blond slept on the floor. But, he couldn't do the opposite and compromise this early on; he didn't want the blond to get accustomed to that kind of treatment. "You can sleep on the coach."

"It's not wide enough. Do you have a futon or something?"

"No."

"Then I'll just use a comforter instead of it."

"Maybe if I pull up as I pull out," Sasuke attempted to opened the sofa bed again, but to no avail.

"Where do you keep your comforters?"

"You're not sleeping on the ground."

"I don't mind."

"I do. Just sleep next to me."

Naruto's jaw fell, and his eyes narrowed. "You're not going to try something, are you? Is this a plan to use my body?" He hugged his chest.

"You are right. You should sleep on the floor," Sasuke frowned.

Naruto chuckled, "I was just joking. Don't take it too seriously. I didn't think you were going to rape me."

"Floor."

"Plus, you are sexy. I bet you get a lot of guys," Naruto shifted after he realized the complement he had made. "Not that I, in particular, find you sexy. Actually, I do. I don't like lying."

"I thought Kiba said you wanted to be an actor?"

"Acting is not lying. You are not fooling anyone, you are not being mistrustful. A writer is not a liar if he writes about a fictional character, is he?"

"Hn," the raven looked away as if not convinced.

"How many boyfriends did you have before?"

"Just one."

"When did you break up?"

"High school."

"You haven't had a boyfriend since high school?!"

"Hn."

"Did you love him?"

"Not really."

"Then why were you together?"

"Hmm…"

"What?"

"You will obsess about it like an idiot."

"I want to know. I promise I won't obsess."

"I thought Itachi liked him. It turned out: he liked Itachi, and Itachi humored him thinking he was a young kid with a crush. And as for him, I really look like my brother."

"Did you sleep with him?"

Sasuke hesitated before mumbling, "Not quite."

"Are you a virgin?!"

Sasuke chuckled, "No."

"Then?"

"Then, I slept with Deidara, Jugo, and a few others."

"Were they into your brother too?"

"No."

"That's a relief."

"Some were his exs. Some were his friends."

"You are awful! How can you even enjoy it if you're preoccupied with your brother all the time?"

"I guess you are right."

"Were you fishing for a complement? For instance, one of them would just scream out as you fuck him 'Oh, Sasuke, you are so much better than Itachi'," Naruto acted, as he fell down on bed and began to rub his body in a theatrical performance.

Sasuke smiled, but quickly frowned again, "I don't appreciate your sarcasm."

"So Deidara was your first?"

"Yeah. How about you?"

"I had six boyfriends."

"Six? Were you aiming for a record?"

"Shut up; I loved all of them."

"I doubt that."

"I did. The first was Hiro. I was fifteen, he was sixteen. He was bi-curious. I was head over heels, but he left me for a girl. He later knocked her up and had to drop out of school."

"I have a rule against dating straights guys who want to experiment, personally."

"Me too. Right after Hiro, I decided I would never do that again. But then I met Hotaka. He was eighteen, and wanted to be a manga ka. Then he left me for another guy. Third was Shikamaru, and my first- if you know what I mean."

"Shikamaru, the friend I met?"

"Yes, but I was so freaked out he'd leave me for someone else like the first two, I was crazy jealous. Plus, he was my friend, so… I guess it could have gotten ugly if it was anyone other than Shika."

"Do you still love him?"

"Just as a friend. Then I dated this forty year old guy who loved to rap even in bed, in the middle of sex. 'I've got energy to spare and sparkling charm. I'm Kirābī! I float… like a butterfly. And sting like a bee!'," Naruto rapped.

Sasuke laid on the bed next to Naruto, laughing. He couldn't control himself. "Why would you date him?"

"He had sparkling charm and floated like a butterfly," Naruto began to snigger. "Plus, I like muscles, and he had some… ah!"

"Hn."

"I don't like being alone…"

"Hn."

"But I guess I meet a lot of weird people since I work at a sex shop. I should know better than to date them."

"Well, you won't date anyone new for a few years, so..."

The blond took in a deep breath. He had forgotten about that detail. Suddenly, he sat up on bed and squealed, "Oh my God, you smell so good. It's like sleeping next to a cupcake!" Naruto fell back and started wiggling. "I want to lick your icing."

The raven blinked a few times. His brain understood that Naruto meant it in an innocent way, but his crotch didn't. "You don't think stuff over before saying them, do you?"

"I should get mad at you, but it's hard staying angry at someone who smells like a cookie," he waved his hands in the air as if fanning the scent, took a deep whiff, and then whimpered.

"Hn." Sasuke detested the sweet smell he always had lingering over him, so when various brands of shampoos and soaps didn't work, he tried to adapt to it. He couldn't pin point where his aversion had oriented. Perhaps it had more to it then just plain preference; perhaps it was rooted to his childhood, he thought.

"Hey, Sasuke."

"Yes?"

"Did your brother ever find out you slept with his exs and friends?"

"Probably, but he didn't show it."

"How much older is he?"

"Five years and nine months."

"Was it all bad with him, growing up?"

"Good night," Sasuke reached out and turned off the lights.

"Was it?"

"No," Sasuke whispered.

Naruto relaxed deeper onto the mattress. He stayed there for an hour, unable to sleep. He wasn't used to Sasuke's bed yet. He sighed, and turned around, touching Sasuke's fingers. The raven removed his hand quickly.

"Are you still awake?"

"Hn."

"It's strange sleeping in bed with someone you don't know well, right?" The blond whispered.

"I always have a hard time sleeping."

"Are you insomniac?"

"Yeah."

"You can take pills for that."

"I don't want to. They are easily addictive."

"So you just lay in bed all night staring at the ceiling?"

"It helps when the person I'm sleeping next to shuts up."

"It is true they call you Hitler at the shop?"

The Uchiha was well aware of the fact that his subordinates weren't fond of him. He was a perfectionist with a sharp tongue, and most of them half-assed their work. Still, Sasuke had expected Naruto to be discrete about it; after all you don't let the teacher in on the inside joke about him. After a long silence, the raven answered, "Yes."

"I heard you made three of them cry before, and one had a nervous breakdown."

"Did Chouji tell you that?"

"No…" Naruto coughed, finally noticing the slope he had been tumbling down. "A birdy."

"Its an exaggeration."

"So you didn't make them cry?"

"They cried, but not because I _made_ them. They are not children. If they had thought about what I said instead of getting offended, they might've learned something." He hated when people cried. He hated it more when they cried because of him, even though he had always managed to make others around him weep easily. Contrary to common belief, he never meant to break them. He never had it in mind when he opened his mouth. His intention was to help them, the harshness in his words was something innate that projected regardless of his intentions. He didn't know how to express himself any other way. "Plus it was one girl, and she was wasting her life and talent chasing a deadbeat boyfriend."

"You sure are heartless," Naruto muttered under his breath, before getting up, and walking out of the room.

"The bathroom is on your right."

"I'm going for a walk," he sighed. In less than twelve hours he was going to be married to man refer to as Hitler. There was no going back after they are pronounced husbands. Growing up, gay marriage wasn't illegalized in Konoha yet, but he had always fanaticized about that day. He always believed that he would find a way to be with the person he loved. Somehow it felt that if he ever married someone after his deal with Sasuke, it wouldn't feel as special. As if he had already shamed the bond by lies.

He walked into the kitchen and began to pour himself a cup of water. He rested his back against the counter, and stared out of the small kitchen window. The light switched on unexpectedly in the apartment opposite to him. At first he didn't pay much attention to the action, but soon he noticed two men making out in their kitchen. He gulped. They were really going at it, he thought, as one man tore the other's shirt off. It had been a while since his last time; he almost groaned.

He could see how the ivory-haired man kissed the other's neck, nibbled on the flesh, and caressed the curves of the brunette's body.

"I think I'll go for a stroll with you as well," Sasuke turned on the light, and then stood staring at the yelping Naruto. "What's wrong?"

The blond quickly looked at the opposite apartment and noticed the two men looking at his way. He squeaked again, before ducking down.

"Is someone there?" Sasuke walked towards the window and looked out, as Naruto pulled down on his pants.

"Get down."

"What's wrong? I can't see anything," Sasuke stated. "Are you playing a stupid game?"

Naruto rolled his eyes, before explaining in whispers, "There were two guys doing it in the apartment opposite to us. I think they saw me looking at them."

Sasuke kneeled down, "Have you heard of porn before, pervert? Beats Voyeurism. Don't spy on my neighbors."

"I am not a pervert and I wasn't spying! T-they just started doing it, and I was here."

The raven looked down at Naruto's crotch, or more appropriately hard-on. The blond flustered, "What! I haven't had sex in a year! Don't judge me."

Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows, "Anyway, are we going for a walk or not?"

"What if I see them down the street or something?! They probably think I'm a pervert."

"You don't look like the type who cares what people think of him. At least if you were, you wouldn't be wearing this color."

"What's wrong with orange?-"

"Well, first of all, it indicates you are dying for attention."

"I'm not an attention whore!"

"Plus, it is just plain bad taste in fashion." Sasuke looked down at Naruto's crotch again, "Now, it's getting awkward."

"I'll go to the bathroom," he buried his face into his hands, and dashed towards the bathroom. "Today sucks!"

The raven chuckled. Something about Naruto's misery had been very amusing. He cracked his fingers, thinking maybe he was a bad person after all. Suddenly, he saw the blond walking out from the bathroom to the bedroom. His legs slowly took him to the room, where he stood by the door smirking.

"What?" The blond hissed.

Sasuke glanced up at the clock, back at Naruto, and then smirked again. "Two minutes?"

Naruto's mouth gapped like a fish out of water. "A-a-a- I wasn't- I wasn't trying to hold back," he stuttered.

"That's for sure."

"Shut up!" Naruto tossed the pillow at Sasuke's face.

Sasuke dodged the projectile easily, as if a master in Ninja arts. "Are we going for the walk or not?"

"I'm never going for a walk with you!"

Thirty minutes later, Naruto stood next to Sasuke in the pharmacy. He played with the medicine bottles amusing himself as Sasuke read the back of a conditioner bottle.

"Are you done yet?" The blond hummed.

"Hn."

"Just get the one in your hand."

"I'm very specific about my hair products."

"Get this one," Naruto picked the nearest one to him. "I tried it before. It's amazing," he lied.

The raven took one critical look at Naruto's mope of blond hair before declaring, "No."

Naruto tossed it back onto the shelf, "We should go to a convenience store afterwards. I want to get some instant ramen."

"No."

"Why not?"

"I'm not allowing this crap into my home. It's 1% natural ingredients, and 99% preservatives, food coloring, and artificial flavors."

"Are you going to make me ramen from scratch?"

"Definitely not. I told you before I'm not your personal cook."

"Then you don't have a say in what I eat."

"I'll just get this one," Sasuke ignored the other.

Sasuke continued to read the ingredients as they walked towards the cashier. In one swift move, he found himself on the floor in one of the aisles, Naruto looking down at him.

"Are you insane?" The raven glared. "Why did you push me?"

"He's here."

"Who?"

"The neighbor! He was coming our way," Naruto whispered animatedly.

Both men suddenly fell silent as the white haired man took a turn into their aisle, as he spoke on the phone. He stood in front of Sasuke, who was still on the ground, and ogled at him with his one visible eye.

"Do you need help?" Kakashi asked, still looking at the odd man on the ground.

"I'm fine. An idiot bumped into me," Sasuke got up and began to dust his clothes.

As if on cue, Kakashi turned around and looked at Naruto, whose face looked drained of blood. "Ah, it's you." He then turned to his phone, "No, not you. I'll have to call you later."

The blond gulped, before laughing nervously. "I don't know you."

"You're the neighbor who was spying at us through the kitchen window. I remember the orange shirt," Kakashi said. Oddly enough, he had a smile on his face.

"I warned you about the orange shirt," Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"It's a mix-up," the blond stammered. "I-I was in the kitchen by accident…"

"Yamato was really upset afterwards," Kakashi explained. In fact, that was the reason he was making a trip to the pharmacy after mid-night. He usually came up with the oddest excuses to avoid being around his boyfriend when angry. After all Yamato could be very intimidating at times. On the other hand, Yamato enjoyed Kakashi's escapes. They allowed him time to relax. "He wanted to call the police."

At the mention of the authorities, Sasuke decided it was time for him to rescue Naruto from the mess he had gotten himself in. "My fiancé is very sorry. Please let me Mr. Yamato, he shouldn't be worried. Naruto is just like a zombie at night. He probably didn't resister what he was seeing until later. Again, I apologize, but you might consider putting some curtains up. We are not the only two residents in the opposite building to you after all. Some even have kids."

"I guess you are right," Kakashi sighed. Yamato had a knack for over-reacting after all. "Did you move in recently? I didn't see you around the neighborhood before."

Sasuke forced his lips up. He figured he should expect more of these questions from now on. "Actually, I've been here for a year, but I haven't had time to actually meet the neighbors with my Job."

"We are getting married tomorrow," Naruto yelped, as if the lies had been eating away at their bubble, until it burst in to a random utterance.

Kakashi blinked, a little startled by the loud revelation.

"Yes," Sasuke gritted his teeth. "Naruto just moved his stuff into my place- _Our_ place, sorry, honey," the raven acted.

"Congratulations."

"Thank you. Well, it was nice meeting you," the raven shook the other's hand, before dragging away Naruto by the arm. "Get it together. You can't freak out every time someone drops a question in our direction."

The blond shook his head, "he didn't believe you."

"Sure he did."

"He didn't. How can two people getting married tomorrow just move in together today," The blond bit his lip.

"We are old fashioned."

"We are gay."

"You can be gay and old fashioned," the Uchiha stated.

"No!"

"Stop freaking out or he'll over-hear you."

"I'm too pretty to go to jail. I don't want to be someone's bitch," the blond sat on the ground. "Plus, I suck at lying, and I hate lying. This is unlike me!"

"Stop being a chicken."

"You have nothing to lose. You'd probably like prison. You'd start your own gang and bully around everyone else."

The raven hissed, getting down to Naruto's level, "Being a coward doesn't seem like you."

"I'm not a coward. I just don't want to be stuck in a big lie."

"You said you needed the money for someone you cared about, right?"

"My grand pa."

"Then keep it together for his sake."

The blond lowered his eyes. He swallowed slowly, "I don't want to be that kind of person. A fraud"

"Or is it a person that helps the ones he cares about?"

"The end justifies the means, huh?"

"Exactly."

The blond nodded. He just hoping by the time this trial reach it's end, he would still be the same person. "You are too persuasive for a bastard. It's scary. You shouldn't have this much power."

Sasuke smirked, "We should get back. It's too late, and we need to get an early start tomorrow."

- To Be Continued-

**Do I hear weddings bells? **

**The groom and groom invite you invite you to share the beginning of their new life together. Stay tuned for the next chapter. **


	3. Chapter 3, Meeting the family

**Chapter 3, "Meeting the family" **

The next morning, Naruto woke up to a sweet smell. He smiled, still in bed. Sasuke's sheet felt as if made of angel feathers. How the light entered the room… It might have been a piece of heaven. The blond sighed; sometimes he saw things more beautiful than they actually were. That was who he was.

He got up, following the smell, with a smile on his face. He stood by the door of the kitchen and watched as Sasuke whisked the pinkish cream. It was hard to imagine Sasuke didn't like baking and cooking. To Naruto, he looked like he fit right in. For a second there, Naruto could have sworn he had seen a fleeting smile on Sasuke's face.

"What are you doing?" He rested his head against the wall.

"Baking," Sasuke looked up. "Do you enjoy asking obvious questions?"

"You said you don't bake at home?"

"Well, I was thinking; I haven't told anyone at work I was getting married, so it wouldn't make sense if I drop in one day and ask them to cater my wedding."

"You will have to tell them one day."

"I'm quitting soon."

"So, what? You're going to prepare all the food for the wedding alone?"

"I do it for others. Why not me? Plus, we only have a few people coming so it won't-" Sasuke froze when he noticed the expression on Naruto's face. "You remembered to invite people, right?"

"I did," the blond smiled nervously. "How many do you mean by a few?"

"Why? How many did you invite?" Sasuke lowered the bowl onto the table, and stared at Naruto suspiciously.

"How many did you want me to invite?"

"No more than ten or so."

The Uzumaki gulped, "I might have invited a few more."

"How many more?"

Naruto started to walk away, "I don't know for sure. I sort of wrote it as a status."

Sasuke bit his bottom lip, "And you didn't think of warning me! I made a reservation for fifteen people Naruto!"

"You didn't tell me there was a limit!" Naruto entered the bathroom quickly, being followed by Sasuke.

"I told you to invite a few close friends."

"I have a lot of close friends. What can I do?! Plus, no one would believe I got married without a bang."

"How many friends on facebook do you have?"

"…"

Sasuke knocked on the bathroom room.

"Maybe two thousand."

"Two-How do you even find time to work?"

"I make very little money!"

Sasuke took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down. "You are an idiot."

"It's already done! Get over it," Naruto turned on the shower.

"Surely not all of them will show. Probably only thirty will see the status, and even less will show up."

The door suddenly opened, Naruto peeking out, "There might be more than thirty. I've never missed an occasion for anyone." He paused for a second before whispering, "I'm sorry. I know it's a business deal for you, but…"

Naruto hated apologizing, but he was feeling guilty. For the life of him, he couldn't figure out why he did it. He had known it would be an issue, and he had gone through with it anyway. It wasn't like him to blind sight someone like that, but he hadn't been himself lately after all. It was difficult to get married, even if pretend, without having his friends around him.

Sasuke hissed, "Fine. I'll handle it."

A few minutes later, Sasuke passed by the bathroom again, knocking on the door. "Update your status. We are moving it to 133 central Konoha street. I already called an acquaintance of mine, and she'll handle the decorations. She's a wedding planner so she should know what she's doing."

The groom opened the bathroom door, hair drizzly, with a few blond hairs sticking to his neck. "Sasuke…"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

Sasuke stared at Naruto for a second. He admired a person who could show gratitude and admit remorse even when he hated it. After all, Sasuke knew he would never have it in him to do such a thing. "It's my wedding too."

"…"

"I have some cupcakes ready-"

"I'll have some!" The blond darted towards the kitchen.

_He recovers fast, _Sasuke thought.

"They're pink!" Naruto bit into the first, his nose immediately covered in icing. "So good! You are a cupcake genius!"

"I'll take a shower. Get dressed," Sasuke commented.

"Can we take some of these for the road?"

"Why? Are you going to be stuffing your face while you are reading your vows?"

It wasn't until later that day when walking to the lawyers' office that Sasuke realized why Naruto wanted to bring the cupcakes along. He walked brooding, as Naruto danced with earphones on his head. As the vein on Sasuke's forehead debated if it should pop or not, the blond raised one hand in the air, and swung around, smiling at others as if everyone else was hearing the same rhythm. Every time he'd pass by someone, he'd offer him or her a cupcake with a wide grin. "We are getting married today. Support gay marriage!"

Sasuke hauled the earphones, "You look demented."

"Nonsense. I'm cheering everyone up."

"You. Look. Demented. Like a crazy person. People are filming you with their mobile phones."

"Don't be a prude. It's our wedding day. Cheer up."

"I can't see how."

"Who cares if you disagree? You are not me! Who made you king of anything?" Naruto sang out loud, before giggling and unexpectedly attacking Sasuke with the earphones. "Listen to it. Listen."

Sasuke pulled it away from his ears, before glaring at Naruto.

"Just listen to the song," the blond grinned. "It would be the soundtrack if my life was in a movie."

The Uchiha rolled his eyes, "You are as excitable as a puppy with ADHD."

"Do you like the song?"

"It's loud, but it's true; it's like you."

"Thank you."

Sasuke sighed; It wasn't a complement. He lowered the cupcake boxes onto the ground, "Why couldn't we have just taken my car?"

"It is just a thirty minute walk."

"It's a five minute drive."

"Just slow down and enjoy the view. People nowadays are in a hurry all the time. They missing out on all the fun, because they are too fixated on the destination rather than the ride."

"You are on acid right now, aren't you?"

"I'm not."

"You are giving people cupcakes in the street, dancing, and talking nonsense."

"If I was I would be eating the cupcakes instead of giving them away. Trust me. I don't get trippy, I get hungry."

"Great, so you are a drug addict as well."

"I'm not a drug addict. I tried a few things when I was younger. Didn't everyone?"

Sasuke glared at Naruto as if he was talking in tongues, "No."

"Whatever. I was never into it anyway."

"Great, I'm marrying a crazy druggy cartoon-freak who will probably be fat in two years."

The blond stomped on the others foot. "Bastard!"

"That's a Amedeo Testoni shoes. Do you know how much they cost, dobe?!"

"Enough to feed a village in Africa."

Sasuke gritted his teeth.

"I'm in a good mood, so stop raining on my parade, ok?! Plus, not everyone who is not a copy of you crazy. I'm not _overweight_, cause I have the metabolism of a God. But if I were, fuck you, I'm awesome anyway! And if you call anime, cartoons one more time, I will 'one thousand years of pain' you."

"You understand that you don't make sense except to yourself, right?"

"Just listen to the song!"

"Whatever," Sasuke tossed the headphones at Naruto's face, still somewhat irritated at the other. "We have to come up with a cover story for how we met."

"I was drunk and you knock me up, and now I have to marry you."

"Are you joking?"

"How can I explain suddenly marrying the same type of guy I despise? Except for the baking." Naruto spoke somewhat faster, as the residue of agitation still bumped in his veins.

The raven frowned. Despise was a strong word, not that he minded if Naruto despised him. He could see Naruto was still somewhat upset about his earlier comment.

"How about something simple? We met at a bar, you spilled your drink on me, we fought at first, but by the end of the night we clicked because we…" Sasuke sighed. "We infuriate each other in all the right ways."

"It's too boring," Naruto stated, now more calm. "You came into my shop-"

"I would never go to a sex shop."

"It's true. People can buy everything online nowadays. Business hasn't been doing well lately…"

"Focus."

"I went to pick up Shouji one day, and I met you. You were mean to him, so to get back at you I drew a penis on the side of your car. You caught me and lectured me about how expensive your car is. I argued that you shouldn't treat your workers as slaves, so you threatened to press charges."

"You are making me sound like an ass."

"We have to keep it realistic."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"People call you Hitler. I'm justified! You can't suddenly turn into an angel."

"Hn."

"Fine, you told me you won't press charges if I clean the car, so I did. I was hungry afterwards so you gave me a banana cupcake, because it was after midnight, and you didn't want me fainting and creating a hassle for you. The next day I drew another penis on your car-"

"Why would you do that?"

"I really liked the cupcake."

"Then buy a cupcake like a normal human being. Don't ruin my car."

"I knew you'd be condescending if you saw me walking into your store the next day like a kicked puppy begging for cupcakes."

"So instead you commit vandalism," Sasuke mocked. "For a cupcake."

"What can I say; your cupcakes are _that _good."

"Fine, then I called the police."

"You seriously called the police on me!"

"You kept vandalizing my car."

"Its because all the fighting was turning me on, especially that you are bossy and you sort of remind me of a teacher I had a crush on when I was in the eight grade."

"That's screwed up. Lets just go back to the bar story."

"You hung up before asking them to come over."

"Why would I hang up? I wouldn't hang up. I'd get them to arrest you."

"Because I kissed you."

"Out of the blue?"

"Yes."

"You would attack a person just like that?"

"Yeah, you kissed me back."

"I wouldn't have."

"You would, and you did. And then you fucked me on the floor of your store."

"That's unhygienic. That would get me in trouble with the health department."

"The next day, I drew another penis on your car. So we did it again, and it was kinky."

Sasuke glared at the other man, "Your imagination is running loose."

"The next day, I came over, but I didn't do anything to your car. And the next, and the next. That's why people didn't see us together. We were always seeing each other late at night, and it was all about crazy passionate sex."

Sasuke rubbed his face, bending over and picking up the cupcake boxes, "We should get going."

Naruto held him back by the arm, "At first we would only exchange insults. But whenever a day came when we didn't meet, we couldn't stop thinking about each other." He leaned closer to Sasuke. "I would think about your lips, and your fingers on me…"

Sasuke gulped, "And?"

"And last week you proposed."

"Just like that?"

"The sex; its mind blowing."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"But I wouldn't marry someone just for the physical part."

"That's why our marriage is going to crumble, and we will get a divorce in three years."

"Hn," the raven nodded looking away. "We'll have to tell this story to our parents."

"My perve of a grand pa wouldn't mind."

"How about my parents?"

Naruto bit his bottom lip, "Fine, lets just go with the bar story."

"My father is not stupid. He will know it's a shame regardless of how well we prepare our story."

"Oh, by the way, your brother lives in Konoha, right?"

"Yes. What about him?"

"He can't own his own business except if he's a citizen, married to one, or has a partner who is a citizen, right?"

"He's married."

"To a man, a woman?"

"A man."

"And…"

"What are you fishing for?"

"More details."

"Why are you fixated on him?"

"Because you are, and I'm getting married to you in exactly two hours. I'm curious."

"He has been married since he was twenty-one. Can we not talk about him for the rest of the day?"

"Fine." The blond looked up at the mirror covered skyscraper, "Is that the lawyers' office?"

"Yes," Sasuke began walking forward, before noticing Naruto was standing still. "What's wrong?"

"Lets wait until Shikamaru shows up."

"I'm not going to con you. The documents are straight forward."

"I don't have anything that makes me worth being scammed, but you have super expensive lawyers on your side. I'd like to have my friend on mine."

Sasuke pursed his lips, before walking over, and leaning against one of the cars. "He's late."

"He'll be here soon."

"He has five minutes, before we go up."

"You can't let five minutes pass without saying something that makes you sound like a jerk," Naruto whispered. Somehow, it felt as if fighting was the punctuation to their sentences. One minute the atmosphere would be serene, and the next they would be cussing at each other. Seconds later, the atmosphere would calm down again. Like bumpy ride, he wondered if he could be able to tolerate it for long.

"You got icing on your shirt."

Naruto looked down at his sleeve, "Ah. Should I just lick it?"

"It has pink dye in it. It might stain."

"If anyone asks, I'll say I got up when I attacked you with kisses this morning as you iced the cakes."

Sasuke smiled, but turned it into a smirk midway. "If that is the kind of thing you'd say to others if you were in a real relationship, then I guess you should. But don't do it to prove our relationship is the real thing. People might notice you being different because you are trying to over-compensate."

Naruto opened his mouth to talk, but closed it quickly.

"What did you want to say?" The raven asked.

"It is the sort of thing I'd say to my friends."

"Ok."

"I also don't mind PDAs."

"Yes?"

"I usually cling to my boyfriends, kiss them, and… You would probably be uncomfortable with this amount of touching in public, right? Should I tone it down, or-"

"I will pretend to be uncomfortable with the public aspect of it. This is what people who know me expect. You just do what people expect from you."

"So our gameplay is; we are too blinded by lust and totally oblivious to the fact that we are wrong for each other. People will see it, but we won't. You will be aloof as usual, and I'll be my loveable self. In a couple of month, we will start complaining about each other. And in three years, our relationship will have completely fallen apart. Great," Naruto smiled.

"You are getting used to lying."

"If I had known I was this good at it, I would have gotten used to it a long time ago," Naruto smiled before waving his hand in the air. "Not really. But some things have to be done. For grand pa's sake, I will put my morals aside."

"Great," Sasuke nodded, before glancing at his watch. "Your friend is late. I'm going in."

XXXXXXX

Naruto closed his eyes as he walked into the room. No one had asked him to, but he had decided to surprise himself. He peeked out, at the white decorations, and the lovely deserts on the side. He smiled. It all looked so real.

He elbowed Sasuke softly, "Your friend is really good at her job. How did she manage to do all that in a couple of hours?"

Sasuke smirked, "I only deal with the best."

"People are going to start showing up soon, honey," Naruto giggled at the last word. "Doesn't suit you."

"Are you worried?"

"I can handle myself."

"Stop smiling like a dope. Do you have a crush on me or something?"

"Shut up! It's my wedding day. I should smile. You should be smiling too."

"I am."

"You're smirking."

"So?"

"It's different," Naruto shook his shoulders. "So what are you going to call me?"

"Hn. Naruto," Sasuke grinned, before leaning towards Naruto's ears. "Don't embarrass me today, dobe."

Naruto suddenly nipped at the other's face, Sasuke jolting back in shock. Naruto laughed out loud, "I startled you!"

"You are an idiot."

"You are a bastard," Naruto walked closer to Sasuke, until their noses touched. He gulped, feeling Sasuke's breath against his lips, before turning around quickly blushing and giggling.

"Seriously? I thought you were into PDAs." Sasuke mocked.

"It's harder when I'm not used to the person," Naruto whined. "I'll try again."

He leaned towards Sasuke, before chuckling at the other's face. Sasuke wiped away the spit he had on his face, glaring at Naruto as if he was about to de-throat him. "Is that how you are going to act for the rest of the day?"

"It's hard!" He chuckled again, before pressing his hand against his mouth in attempts to calm himself down. "Okay. Okay. I'm calm. I won't laugh this time around."

Once he leaned towards Sasuke, he burst into laughter again. The raven rolled his eyes, "Today is going to be a disaster. I can tell."

"Grand pa!" Naruto suddenly began waving at the longhaired man coming from across the room.

"Naruto," the man whispered.

Naruto smiled at Jiraiya, "I'm getting married."

The man was usually a cheerful one, but today was different. Naruto couldn't fool him. He knew what the boy was sacrificing for his sake and for his mistakes, and it left a burden on his shoulders he felt he could never lift.

"Grand pa… Aren't you going to congratulate me?" Naruto whispered, his voice fading.

The man suddenly pulled the boy into an embrace, tapping against his back emotionally, and watching as Sasuke looked away uncomfortable with the scene.

"You don't have to pay for my mistakes."

"What are you talking about?" Naruto smiled.

"Brat, I know why you are marrying him."

"Because I love him," the blond faked a smile, eyes burning from the tears. He grasped Naruto's hand into his, pushing his shoulder near Sasuke's.

"You've always been a bad liar," the old geezer stated. "It is my fault. I taught you to endure no matter what gets thrown at you. But this is not-"

"I'm not lying!" he hugged Sasuke's arm. "This is what I want. You said you'd support me whatever way I go."

The old man glanced at Sasuke before dragging Naruto by the hand to the corner of the room, "Don't do it. He looks as stiff and uptight as a blow up doll. Believe me, he'll end up being boring in bed. You're a lover by nature like your grand pa. It runs in your blood. He doesn't suit you."

The raven glared at the two men's back, hear their chat clearly. He had been tuning down his overbearing nature with Naruto in order to make things work, but he was approaching the end of his patience.

"Just tell me you sampled him," Jiraiya insisted.

"He's very good," Naruto stated.

"He doesn't look it."

"He is-"

"How big is he?"

"Pervert!"

"Do not settle for the cocktail-size when you could have a big thick-"

Sasuke snapped, smacking Naruto on the back of the head. The blond turned around rubbing the sore patch, "I was defending you!"

The raven just glared back.

"He looks abusive," Jiraiya glared at Sasuke as well. "What kind of intentions do you have for my grand son?"

"You know why this is happening," Sasuke gritted his teeth. "So stop trying to persuade him out of it even though you know your ugly habits are the only reason he is stuck sacrificing the next three years of his life."

"Hey! Don't talk to my grand pa like that!" Naruto's expression changed completely, anger suddenly occupying every crease in his face.

"People are starting to show up," Shikamaru stated as he walked closer to the men, trying to get them to calm down. "And it's done. The marriage has already been registered, so lets just let this party pass by peacefully."

Shouji suddenly appeared, patting Naruto on to the back. "Do you want something to eat to calm you down?"

"No," Naruto stated, eyes still fixated on Sasuke. "I need a minute alone."

**- To be continued- **

**Every time you don't review, a cupcake gets over-baked and burned! **

**Just kidding… But seriously, please review. **


	4. Chapter 4, The groom's side

**Chapter 4, "The groom's side"**

A few minutes later, the blond sat on the bathroom's floor, fisting his golden mope. The door slowly opened, before the raven walked in.

"Your guests are here. You shouldn't keep them waiti-"

"You are hard to love, but you are impossible to like."

"Is this because of what I said to that old-"

"Don't!"

"Hn."

"He's my family!"

"How about when you were meddling into mine? Didn't you say-"

"You might be okay not talking to your family even on your wedding day, hating them, and holding grudges. But I'm not. I can't even imagine a day passing without him calling to check on me, so unless you have something constructive to say, stay out of my family business."

"I was standing up for you," the raven hissed, regretting revealing his thoughts. "He was just trying to make himself feel better by getting you to convince him that it was your choice-"

"It is my choice! I choose to be happy when I help people I love."

"You choose to be naïve. You're wasting your life for the sake of a person-"

"Beats wasting my life for the sake of envy and insecurity."

The Uchiha remained silent for a few minutes, before finally speaking, "I think you insecure too. You are so terrified people won't like you so you have to resort to grand gestures to guilt them into giving you affection. You know you are a loser, and the only thing you have to offer is acting like an overly friendly puppy. This is why you go around the streets giving people sweets, isn't it? No one would love a loud loser dying for affection without some encouragement," Even before the last word had left his mouth, the guilt had stricken Sasuke.

The blond stood up, frowning, and holding his chest. He had hoped he could get along with the man, but that aspiration was slipping away by the second. He was already tired and exhausted today, he didn't need that bastard pushing his buttons; pouring salt over his open wounds.

Sasuke hissed lowly, walking towards Naruto. He cornered the other into the wall, wiping away tears off tanned cheeks with his thumb. "You look like a mess."

The blond furrowed his eyebrows; He didn't realize he had started crying. "I'm not crying…"

"It's allergies, right?" Sasuke mocked, hand getting slapped away by Naruto. "Seriously crying even though you were the one dashing it first?"

"I can wipe my own face!" Why was he being this emotional? He cussed inwardly. He would have never cried because of a silly argument. The stress of the step he was about to take, perhaps.

Sasuke bit his lips. The taste of guilt like acid in his throat; it made him nauseous. Fake husband or real; wasn't he supposed to look after the blond? Plus, he honestly hated tears. Seeing people exposed in front of him, made him uncomfortable to say the least ever since he was a child.

"You are not a child. I won't feel bad because you have over active tear glands." Was that really his attempt to make Naruto feel better? He groaned inwardly. He was the worst person when it came to consoling others. His tongue never obeyed him, even after making resolutions about wanting to become kinder.

"Fuck you! Just leave and I'll be out soon!"

He hissed, crossing his arms. Naruto ignored him, and began to wash his face as he sniffled, body shaking. The raven gulped, reaching his hands out in hesitation, his fingers brushing against Naruto's back. Suddenly, Naruto turned around. "What are you doing?!"

"Nothing," he gulped.

"Don't touch me!"

"I wasn't touching you."

"I felt your fingers against my back, you perve."

"I'm an idiot for trying to comfort you," Sasuke whispered inwardly. "I just wanted to give you this," he pulled something out of his pocket.

Naruto took it into his hands, glancing down intently. "Homemade caramels?"

"Yeah."

"Are you bribing me? Because fuck you. I'm not that cheap."

The raven shifted his weight on his feet, eyes staring at the doorknob as someone tried to open the locked door from outside.

"You don't have to worry. I'll keep my word. I'll act like I love I get out of the bathroom. I'll fucking love you in public like no one ever did," Naruto sniffled.

Sasuke nodded. He still didn't want Naruto tormenting through out the event. He could apologize now, but apologizing was yet another weakness of his. He wasn't a people person, was he? He wondered. "Naruto-"

"I'm ready. Lets go ahead," he headed for the door, faking a brave face.

"Naruto!"

The blond froze, "What?"

Sasuke took in one deep breath, "Remember when I told you if people listened to me instead of crying, they might learn something?"

"You're so smug," the blond jeered.

Sasuke heaved another deep breath, "Sometimes words don't come out the way…"

"Are you trying to apologize?" the blond turned around, looking Sasuke in the eye.

Sasuke cracked his neck. Yes, he hated this. "Do you accept it?"

"Finish it first."

He hissed, "Seriously?"

"Go ahead."

He stared at Naruto for a second before muttering quickly, "I'm sorry I said those things to you."

"Why?"

"Don't rub it in."

"…"

"Because I don't want you on the verge of crying all day long when this is supposed to be a happy occasion. I don't think it matters if the shame wedding is happy or not, but obviously you care; so I don't want you to be miserable today."

"So you think I'm a loser, you just don't want me tormenting over it?"

"That's not what I said."

"I'll prove you wrong, you know. I don't care if you think I'm a loser or not, I'll just take that pain inside of me and use it as ammo. And when I'm on the big screen, bigger than life, you'll see me and know how wrong you were about me," the blond smirked, smile cracking at the sides. "And you'll beg me to come visit your store for promotion!"

Sasuke smiled back, "You better do it, or I'll never let you hear the end of it."

"And you'll never be able to call me a dobe again. Believe it."

"Until then, dobe," he ruffled with Naruto's blond mop, earning himself a pout. "Lets do it."

On the count of three, the newly weds pushed the bathroom door open, and immediately they were pulled from one group to the other getting congratulated. Somehow they all seemed to be friends on Naruto.

"Is that the lucky guy?" Omoi jumped over Naruto, burring him under his arm.

"I have good taste, don't I?" The blond chuckled, before leaning against Sasuke. He hesitated for a second, before kissing the milky cheek. Sasuke gulped, looking away. "He doesn't like when I do that in public, but I can't help myself."

"How come I didn't meet him earlier? Huh? Do you like keeping him all to your self?" The man chuckled, eyeing Sasuke. The raven was smirking at him, or was that just the natural expression his friend's new husband always wore. No, he definitely smirking of him. Did the raven have bad intentions? He gulped; what if Sasuke hated him? He wouldn't let Naruto invite him to future events. After a while, Naruto would start to forget about him. Their bond would dissolve and in a couple of years, Naruto would not even remember his name, he thought.

"What's with this expression?" Naruto chuckled, pinching his friends tanned cheeks. "You look scared."

"Nothing. Nothing at all! I need to go…" He walked away.

"What's wrong with him?" Sasuke whispered in Naruto's ear.

"He gets lost in his thoughts sometimes, and you sort of scared him. Smile for God's sake!"

"I'm smiling."

"You're smirking. How many times do I have to tell you there is a difference between smiling and smirking? Smiling doesn't creep people out, American psycho's smirks do."

The raven stared at Naruto blankly for a second before losing the smirk completely.

"Now you're frowning!"

"This is my blank expression. It happens to be very-"

"Rapy?"

"Next comment costs you a tooth."

The blond pursed his lips trying to hide his smile at the third expression on Sasuke's face. It was true; Sasuke was cute when angry. He pulled him in suddenly, and placed a kiss on forehead. Sasuke gulped, eyes wide open.

He stared at the blond who had recovered fast and began to smile at the other guests. He could see the nape of Naruto's neck, tanned, with a few soft blondish hairs. Handsome. Beautiful. But he was just a business partner or all he cared, he repeated internally.

"Sasuke, Sasuke, come here. Meet Ayami. We went to school together," the blond gestured in the air.

Sasuke put on a soft smile, before heading towards the cluster of guests. "Nice to meet you."

"Ahhh, Naruto!" The girl chuckled. "You know how to pick'em. How handsome!"

"Isn't he?!" Naruto grinned widely, before tapping Sasuke on the shoulder and winking at him, "Everyone is fawning all over you today, lucky groom. I'm starting to get jealous. I need some love too. I spent an hour on my hair."

Sasuke coughed twice, looking away, trying to hide his blush. He didn't like to be the center of attention, and Naruto was forcing him under the spotlight.

"You're not wearing the rings yet?!" The girl pulled on Naruto's hand.

The blond smiled anxiously for a second, freaking out internally. Had they forgotten all about the rings?

"In a few minutes we will be wearing them," Sasuke added quickly. "We thought we should do it here in front of all our friends and family instead down by the registrar."

Naruto added, "I wish we could've had a priest or someone here, but you know…"

"I know…" She frowned.

"Plus, neither of us is religious anyway," he smiled again.

"But you could've gotten one of your friends to preform your wedding. You know Jacky did this for-"

"I need to go check on the buffet," Sasuke interrupted. "Excuse me."

Once the man was a couple of feet away, the friend smiled at Naruto, "How come I haven't heard of him before?"

Naruto gulped. It seemed to be a popular question today. "It is all recent, but…" he lied. "I feel like I've known him for years though. I know he's the one."

"So romantic!" The girl squealed again. "When and how did you meet?"

"You have to wait with everyone else," he poked his tongue out. "I didn't get to say my vows in front of you guys, so I have a little speech prepared instead."

"Speaking of guests, where are your in laws? Are they nice?"

Naruto bit his lip, "I didn't meet them yet."

The girl gasped, "They are not here." She then pursed her lips as if she had realized something tragic about the other man. "He didn't come out to them yet, did he?"

"Our marriage is just so sudden, we thought we shouldn't spring it on them-"

"Is he estranged?"

"No-"

"Naruto, be honest with me. There are support groups I can recommend."

Immediately Sasuke popped in, "Can I borrow him for a second?"

"Yes," Naruto smiled, relieved that the man had just rescued him from the interrogation. Once they were alone in one of the dressing rooms, he let out a deep breath, "Man, we were about to get made. What did you need me for?" He noticed that Sasuke was frowning. He gulped. "What's wrong?"

"Did you invite Itachi?" Sasuke gritted his teeth, looking as if he was about to bust out of his rails.

"No," Naruto stated. "I wouldn't do it after-"

"Someone must've invited him, Naruto, and-"

"Maybe it is someone who knows him from your guests-"

"What guests?! The only guests here from my side are my co-workers and only because you made me invite them today!"

"You didn't invite any family?" Naruto lowered his voice, a little sad.

"Most of my family loves in Suna, Naruto. They wouldn't bother coming here even if invited them."

"Why not?"

"That's not even the point now. Did you invite Itachi-"

"I didn't! I already said I didn't! Plus I don't know how to reach him even if I wanted too."

Sasuke walked back, chest raising and plummeting. "Whatever. I have to get rid of him as soon as possible."

"Why? He's your brother. Just enjoy having him around. For just one day, set aside all the negative feelings you have for him."

"He's just here to measure you up against Kisame."

Naruto wet his lips, walking towards one of the overly decorated chairs and sitting down, "So are you ashamed he's going to see me?"

"No. He just has bad intentions."

"I doubt it. But even if he do, don't let him ruin the day. Pretend to be happy in front of him. No. **Be happy!**"

"Come with me," Sasuke suddenly heaved Naruto's hand and began to dashed outside.

The raven maneuvered between the people quickly, forcing Naruto to bumping into a few, and ignoring at the people tried to congratulate them.

"Sasuke, slow down."

"Where is he?" He didn't even look back.

"Chill. We'll find him-"

"Is that him?"

"Ah-" He pulled Naruto towards the pool outside, before letting go of his hand once he had a closer at the man outside.

Naruto held his sore hand, "It's going to leave a bruise. Already abusive?"

"Where is he? I'm sure. I saw him come in," Sasuke turned around, trying to scan the surroundings for his brother. "Come-" He reached for Naruto's hand.

"No!" The blond swept his hand away. "People don't even pull their dogs like that!"

Sasuke took in a deep breath, "I want to find him."

"Then find him alone!"

"I won't drag you anymore. Just keep up with me."

"Lets just do it," Naruto pushed him to the side and began to walk into the crowd again. He suddenly froze, as he a face oddly familiar to Sasuke's. "Is that him? Oh, you look like twins."

"That's him right."

"Sasuke," the man suddenly spotted them, and began to walk their way with an angelic smile on his face.

"See how he's smiling at us," Sasuke hissed. "You could just see the evil-"

The blond rolled his eyes, "Sasuke, you, especially, don't talk about smiles. Plus, he looks like the more normal between you two-"

"He's a good actor. He likes to pretend like he's the good guy-"

The man hugged Sasuke as soon as he arrived, holding the very distressedyounger brother for a little too long. He moved away, ruffling with Sasuke's hair. "I miss you, little Sasuke."

"I'm not little anymore," the raven grumbled.

"Hello. I'm Itachi Uchiha. I'm Sasuke's older brother," he said to Naruto.

Naruto smiled, "I'm Naruto. You might figure it out from the tux, but I'm marrying your brother."

"Welcome to the family-"

Sasuke huffed loudly, "Yeah, right."

Itachi turned to Sasuke, "Mother told me you came to Konoha last year. I tried to contact you, but it seems that I keep missing you. I left you messages."

"I never check my messages."

"I figured."

"Who invited you to my wedding, Itachi?"

"Sasuke!" Naruto elbowed him. "You are being rude."

"It's okay Naruto," the older brother's smile faded. "I thought my invitation must've been lost in the mail. You wouldn't get married without inviting your family, would you? You were my best man."

"It was just a spontaneous thing!" Naruto butted in to justify. "We were basically eloping until I screwed up and mass publicized it today on my facebook."

"I see… Well it's good the real-estate agent told me about it then."

"Real-estate agent?" Sasuke asked. He invited her.

"The Uchiha name is unique I guess. She thought you were buying the store right next to me as an extension for mine, so she called yesterday to set the date for finalizing the paper work. She said you are probably busy with the preparations for your honeymoon," Itachi said as if he was blaming the other. As if his words should have continued on about how shocking and saddening it was to hear about his brother buying a shop next to his and getting married from a stranger.

Sasuke looked away, "You know about the shop."

"You always loved competing with me Sasuke," he smiled, as if he didn't want to blame the other anymore on his special day. "Congratulations on your marriage. Naruto looks like a great guy."

"Thank you."

"I'll be leaving now," he nodded, before turning to Naruto. "Take care of him. He can be a little aloof sometimes, but don't let it fool you. He has a soft creamy surprise center like the hard candy he used to love so much."

As the man walked away, the two grooms stood in silence as if he had dropped a silent bomb.

"I thought you didn't like sweets?"

"I don't. He used past tense."

"I see…"

"Hn."

"I want to say he looks nice and kind, and a little hurt, but you'd get upset."

"I would."

"So your shop is right next to your brother's?"

"It wouldn't make sense if it was in an area with a different traffic."

"Yes, it wouldn't make sense to spite someone, but not steal their customers too," Naruto whispered.

"Are you going to start blaming me again?"

"No. I'll let you do that to yourself."

"I won't."

"Not now. Not yet, you won't."

"Lets head inside," Sasuke walked faster.

"Sasuke, come dance with me," Naruto suddenly smiled.

"Recovered already? I thought you were going to hate me for the rest of the day."

Naruto ignored him, dragging him from the hand to the dance floor. Sasuke almost tripped as the man forced him towards him. "Doesn't feel good to be dragged, does it?"

"Whatever!"

"That's my favorite song. Remember?" He chuckled loudly, trying to get the other to hear him over the sound of the music. He wrapped his hands around a Sasuke's neck, and poked their noses together.

"I don't like dancing."

"C'mon!"

"I don't-"

"Please," Naruto poked out his bottom lip, trying to be cute. Suddenly he whined as the song faded away. "It ended."

"Now this song I can dance to," a slower song came on. Ballade. Sasuke wrapped his hands around Naruto's waist, immediately taking the lead.

"I thought you didn't like dancing?" Naruto said as he tried to fight him for the lead role, before realizing it looked bizarre and gave up his struggle.

"I don't, but I know how to do some ball room dances."

"Ball room dancing, pastry making, wedding organizing, custom suits. Are you gay?" Naruto pretended to be shocked, teasing.

Sasuke smiled, then pouted, "Does it show? I always thought it would always be all the gay sex that outs me."

"You won't be having much of it for the next three years."

"Hmm."

"Do you think by the time we will be divorced, dating will have changed? Sex? Like new kinky stuff will be all hip, and I'll be like a grandpa-"

"Sex has always been the same, silly."

"I doubt that. I've done some things that might have been illegal in the past."

"Like what?" Sasuke smirked at the other.

"You are a pervert," Naruto chuckled.

"I think if anyone heard our conversation, they would agree _you _are the pervert."

"Whatever! It means I'm fun."

"It doesn't."

"It does!"

"Doesn't."

"Does!"

"Do-"

"You better be nice to me. I'm your only chance at sex for the next couple of years."

Sasuke pulled Naruto closer, letting the other rest his head on his shoulder, "Is that an offer?"

"I bet people looking at us now think we are so in love. I'm resting my head on your shoulder as we dance to a romantic song," Naruto whispered. "They probably don't think we are talking about sex-stuff."

"Was it an offer?"

"No," Naruto gulped.

"I'm your only chance too, and I can tell-"

"If you said anything about me being easy, I'm stepping on your foot."

"I didn't know your easy, but now that you've say it-" Sasuke suddenly bit his lip as pain shoot from his foot.

"Oh, sorry baby, did I step on your foot? I'm so clumsy," Naruto struggled against the urge to poke his tongue out. "Aw!"

"Ah, I slipped."

"Your foot slipped?!"

Sasuke quickly pulled him to his chest, before anyone else noticed their scuffle. "We can't sleep together though."

"Whatever. Plus you only sleep with people who have slept with your brother-"

"I wasn't trying to insult you," Sasuke hissed. "I was just making an observation. We can't sleep together, because we can't risk someone falling in love with the other."

"I guess you mean me when you say someone. Because your dick is made out of cupid's arrows, right? Get over yourself," Naruto huffed. "Although your food…"

"You're going to fall in love with me over cookies?"

"I have a weakness."

"I can't feed you then."

"But then I might fall in love with some other chef, and end our deal," Naruto pulled the other's leg.

"Hn."

Naruto then lowered his head back onto Sasuke's shoulder, whispering, "You really smell good."

"So you have said."

"I can just stay this all night," he closed his eyes. Sasuke's scent was truly relaxing.

The raven slowly wrapped his hands around him, letting one hand wonder into the blond mope. "Don't sleep."

"I won't," he tightened his grip around Sasuke.

**- To be continued - **

**Review for cookies. **


	5. Chapter 5, Boney bed

**Hi All, **

**I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Chapter 5, "Boney bed" **

Naruto woke up the next day feeling something soft yet somewhat boney beneath him. He looked down and noticed Sasuke looking up at him. "Where am I?"

"In my bed. You've been sleeping on top of me for two hours now. My hand is numb."

"I'm sorry. You could've just pushed me aside."

"Then you would've woken up."

"It's okay. I would've fallen asleep again. What time is it?" He sniffled and shook his head. "You're room is too bright!"

"It's four."

"So early."

"In the afternoon."

"Are you serious?! I'll miss my shift," Naruto jolted out of bed.

"You're on your honey moon. And your grand pa is the owner of the sex shop you work at."

"Why wouldn't you just say "the shop"? Why did you have to say "the sex shop you work at"?"

"Are you ashamed?"

"No, but your attitude conveys no support. You know, I was going to bring back a butt plug for you as a wedding gift, but not anymore. And, pervy grand pa is not the owner. Ebisu is, but he lets grand pa do whatever he wants to it."

"That's unwise."

"Grand pa is his god father and guru."

"Is he the same man I met?" The man spoke in disbelieve. The man he met was mess; he didn't even shave for his grandson's wedding.

"He used to be different. Before my parent's accident," Naruto said the last part quickly. "He got addicted to booze, gambling, and women…"

"What was he like?"

"I don't remember much. I was young. But from what his friends tell me, he used to be really brilliant writer He wrote a best seller called tales of a gusty ninja. Now he just writes erotic books."

"I think I read this book when I was younger," Sasuke narrowed his eyebrows. "It was one of my favorites. Now that I think of it-"

"The name character was called Naruto? Yes. I was named after him. The name was actually Naruko, a girl he used to love in high school who died while trying to get kids out of a burning building. He says that her name should be under the definition of hero."

"I see. I thought you were named after a fish-cake."

"He liked those too. I did look her up after wards and discovered she is actually a porn star."

"So you are named after a female porn star?"

"Yup. That will make a funny story for an interview when I'm famous."

"I see," Sasuke nodded. "Pack your bags."

"I have a shift. I run the shop. They wouldn't be able to tell the Economical cowhide whip from horse whip without me there."

"I never heard a more disturbing sentence in my life."

"Don't act as if you are all vanilla! I've seen the inside of your closet!"

"There is nothing in my closet-"

"The black box."

"I see…" Sasuke paused. "And what were you doing in my closet?"

"Like I'd marry you without knowing what weird shit you are into."

"And you are okay with the 'weird shit' you saw in my box."

"Yeah. Nothing extreme."

"Good, because if you violate my privacy again, I'll use them on you."

"I know you say that as a threat, but all I heard is sexual advances. It is not like I've never been tied up and gagged in my life. Who hasn't?! I'd probably like it."

"Hn."

"But I should've guessed you are somewhat sadistic."

"Enough with that-"

"And you love control." Naruto then chuckled, "I feel bad for you. I was the worse possible choice for someone who loves to control his or her other half. Sometimes I can be a handful, and a bit stubborn."

"Honestly, I don't understand how you can be so comfortable talking about sex and working around it, even though you got hard and flustered when you accidently saw a couple making out across the window," Sasuke smirked at Naruto.

The blond looked down at his feet, "I can be comfortable around it."

"Are you lying to me?"

"Fine! I might have exaggerated my sexual experiences a tiny bit. I just don't want you thinking you're the kinky expert and I'm the vanilla twink who has only tried two positions before."

"I thought you hated lying."

"You are a bad influence."

"And just two positions? Seriously?"

Naruto opened and closed his mouth like a fish, flustered. He put his hands up trying to show Sasuke a position with his fingers. "Does this count as the same position as this one?"

Sasuke ogled at the hands for a while, before pointing at a finger, "What is this finger supposed to be?"

"His leg."

"And this?"

"My arm."

"You are not even doing it in this position. It is physically impossible."

"No wait," Naruto looked back at his fingers trying to figure something out. "There was definitely something there."

"Did you leave the remote in bed that night by any chance?"

"No…" Naruto whispered before realizing what the other was insinuating, "I didn't sleep with my remote!"

"You are more or less a virgin."

"I'm not! There aren't even that many positions out there for gay guys."

"Really? What about this one?" Sasuke made a hand symbol.

"What? How is that possible?"

"Yoga. How about this one? This is one of my favorites."

"Oh…"

"I need your hand for the next one-"

"Enough."

"This one is great if he is good with his mouth-"

"Sasuke! Stop!"

"Why? Are you turned on?"

"Shut up!" Naruto immediately got up and shot towards the bathroom.

"See you in two minutes," Sasuke chuckled, enjoying how uncomfortable the other was.

Two minutes later, Naruto sat on the closed toilet seat, wondering what he could do to pass the time before going out again. He didn't need Sasuke commenting on how fast he had finished again.

"Oh, bridal magazines," he smiled as he reached for the one on top of the stack. "Honeymoon articles. This might be good research."

"You are not in there trying to pass time, are you?" Sasuke spoke from across the room.

"Ahhhh," Naruto faked a loud moan, before looking back down at the magazine.

After fifteen minutes, Naruto called out, "Where are we going?"

"Some resort on the beach."

Naruto walked out, "Why do you have bridal magazines in your bathroom?"

Sasuke took the magazine from Naruto's hand before turning the pages to a spread that featured him, "I'm in the hot section for wedding desserts."

**Ten days later**

Naruto sat in front of Sasuke on the table, as the raven poured the batter into the mold. The blond had a chuckled at their honeymoon photos, as he flipped through the tablet.

"I like this one," he smiled, and showed it to an unconcerned Sasuke. The men were kissing in the photo on the beach. Naruto had kept the act going for the photos. They needed them after all. Plus, it was fun to act as a couple at a couple's resort after all. "How come I got so tanned and you didn't? I smothered myself in sunscreen."

"It's in my gene's, dummy. I'm from Suna." Sasuke smirked. "Why are you here?"

"Boss said I could have a couple more days off."

"I know that. Why are you here and not around your friends?"

"I love my hubby," Naruto poked his tongue out.

"This is my place of business."

"Then I'll be on my way. I just need fifty cookies wrapped individually."

"Are you planning on walking down the streets giving them out like an idiot?"

"Just to our neighbors. Plus it will be great promotion for when you open your own shop," Naruto suddenly slapped his hand over his mouth. "I shouldn't have said that here."

"You have a big mouth, but don't worry; I already gave my notice."

"Really? When will you leave?"

"The end of the month."

Naruto pouted, before suddenly smiling again at Sasuke. He bit his lip like a naughty child, "Itachi happened to be calling when I was on my way down."

"I trust you let it go to voicemail."

"Hmm," he hummed. "He is really fun you know."

"When is this going to get through your thick skull? I'm not interested in having a relationship with my brother."

"He told me you used to love the candy he made you. How come you hate candy now?"

"He remembers things the way he wants to, and not the way they are."

"Why?"

"In high school he used to bribe me with candy to keep me away from him and his friends. I used to think he is a nice brother then, until I heard him talking about it to his friends and I figured it all out; he didn't want his younger brother in his life," he began to ice a cake.

"I'm sure you heard him wrong."

Sasuke huffed, "Yeah right."

"Is this why you hate candy? You felt betrayed?"

"I guess."

"I don't want to underestimate your _misery, _but seriously?! You have been hating your brothers for years because he didn't want his young brother hanging with him when he was a teenager? Shika's older brother once clubbed him in the face, and they are best buds now. Grow up."

"Leave, now!"

Naruto pouted before reaching for the icing being whisked by Sasuke, before having his hand slapped away.

"Meanie!"

Sasuke frowned at the other. It was honestly hard to frown at Naruto, especially since he had the most irresistible puppy face ever. Yet, Sasuke was an expert at frowning and glaring.

"I'll go get you the cookies, and then you are out of here," Sasuke waved his finger at Naruto like an angry teacher, before walking away.

Naruto chuckled. All together, he got what he wanted. Maybe living with Sasuke wasn't going to be as hard as he expected. Suddenly, he saw a blond girl peeking at him from behind the shelves. She squeaked and hid once he realized he saw her.

In one move, he sprung of the table and walked towards her. "I can still see the top of your hat."

She walked back out, and reached her hand for him to shake, "I'm Ino. I'm the sous chef. Sorry, I couldn't be at your wedding," she examined him with her eyes as if measuring him up. "It was very surprising. Especially that he turned out gay," she whispered the last sentence to herself.

Naruto laughed, "It surprised us too. We were moving too fast."

"Oh, so how long have you known Sasu- Chef Sasuke for?" She rested her hand over her hip.

'_What's wrong with that girl's attitude?' _Naruto thought. "A couple of months."

"So what do you do? Are you rich or something?"

"No, no, I work in retail."

"Not fashion retail I guess," she eyed his outfit.

"Wow, you really don't hold back," Naruto raised his eyebrows. If she had been a guy, he would have handled the situation in some other manner, but those… those were boobs.

Sasuke walked back in with two large arraignments of wrapped cookies, muffins, and other sweets. "I didn't find fifty cookies, so you'll have to make due with-" Sasuke paused when he noticed the girl. He wasn't very talkative around his subordinates. "Do you need something Ino?"

"I was just meeting Naruto," she smiled sweetly at him.

"More like cross examining Naruto," the blond muttered under his breath.

"I'll go check on the… something," she left quickly as she noticed Sasuke's glare.

"For once, I'm glad you glared at someone," Naruto stated.

"I hate working with girls."

"Don't be sexist. IT's not their fault she belongs to their gender."

"They just can't separate between their job and their emotions."

"So, you think she has a crush on you."

"I'm sure of it," Sasuke tapped Naruto on the head with a chocolate at the end of a stick. "Leave."

"Did you know she had a crush on you when you started working here?"

"She can't keep it subtle as you might have already noticed."

"And why didn't you tell her you were gay then?"

"It was none of her business."

"But she liked you," Naruto stated as if it should make sense to the other. "Not telling her would be leading her on."

"If I told her I was gay, it meant I noticed her crush, and if she knew I noticed it and didn't return the feelings, it would have made the work environment very awkward for the both of us and the others around us. Plus, it will be over soon. I didn't offer her a job to come with work at my shop." Sasuke then added, "But this _is _the topic we shouldn't talk about here."

"You asked some?"

"A few."

"Who?"

"The best."

"Like who?"

"What do you want to ask really?" Sasuke stared at the blond.

"You look like you know what I want to ask. Don't be a tease."

"I didn't invite Chouji, no."

"Fuck you, he's the best."

"He's also your friend. So I will write him the best recommendation letter that could exist, but-"

"What's wrong with him being my friend?! He vouched for you, you ungrateful bastard. He's the only one who didn't call you Hitler."

"If a problem arises between us, he'll be stuck-"

"A problem has arised between us!" Naruto flipped Sasuke before stomping out of the kitchen.

"It's 'arisen', you idiot."

Naruto walked back into the kitchen and raised his other finger.

"Oh no, you gave me the finger; now I _have_ to hire him," Sasuke snickered.

"I only have two middle fingers, but if I had more, I'd give them to you!" The blond began to stomp out of the kitchen again, and then the shop. Then walked back in, "I'm never sleeping in the same bed as you again, by the way."

"The best thing I got from you in that bed, is your leg in my stomach during my sleep. I'll be glad if you never sleep in the same bed as me again."

"Well then I'll never never sleep in the same bed as you again," Naruto hesitated for a second trying to decipher what he had just said. "I'll even sleep on top of you. I'll hug you and spoon you and- and- and-"

"Do you want to sneeze?"

Naruto nodded, trying to hold it back, before Sasuke handed him a tissue. He sneezed cutely, before looking at Sasuke again. "And I'll call Itachi and invite him over for dinner, **baby.**"

"You do that, and rip you a new one."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?!"

When the clock struck four that night, Sasuke tiptoed into his apartment, with two shoes dangling off his fingers. He bent down onto the floor, and looked for any light coming from beneath his bedroom door, or their bedroom now.

"Good, he's sleeping."

"He's not," a rough voice growled, rousing a commonly composed man, and forcing him to jump.

"You're awake!"

"Seems so," Naruto spoke deeply again, in contrast with the high pitch Sasuke's voice carried.

"Hmm," Sasuke gulped. He would later describe the feeling he felt at that moment as a child who was about to be spanked by a parent. He had to think up some excuse for he was late. No. No. He didn't owe Naruto shit, he thought, before the words exited his mouth involuntarily, "After you left, some friends called and they were in Konoha just for the night. I didn't see your missed calls until later, but I thought you would probably be sleeping… so…"

Naruto got up and headed for the bedroom, "good night, Sasuke."

"G-good night," Sasuke's mouth opened, trying to figure out the right words for the situation. Naruto was obviously angry, and a silent Naruto was somewhat more intimidating than a screaming one. Sasuke shook his head again; why was guilt drawing itself in his words? He shouldn't feel guilty. Why was he lying to Naruto? The man wasn't really his husband. "About our argument today, I thought it over. I think I'll ask Chouji if he'd accept working with me. He's one of the most talented people I've ever worked with. It would be a loss if- Naruto, are you listening?"

"I'm sleeping," the boy turned around in bed, ignoring the other man.

"You're obviously not sleeping."

"Because you keep talking to me."

"Is this supposed to be the silent treatment?"

"I'm not silent."

"Because it is not going to work. I was late. So what? It's not like you are really my husband."

"I'm not. Be late as much as you want. I won't worry for you again, even if you don't answer my twenty-two missed calls. I won't worry."

"They were twenty-two…"

"Good night, Sasuke."

Sasuke took a deep breath, starting at Naruto's body in bed. "I can visit you tomorrow at the store."

"By the way, did you drink with you friends? You don't look like you have," Naruto asked, other meanings obvious in his tone of voice.

"Ah, yeah, my friend is sober so-"

"So you don't need to keep making up lies and excuses. You don't owe me any."

That ended the conversation. Later when Sasuke crawled into bed, he waited for Naruto climb on top of him as usual. He waited for the blond to smell him and comment on how good he smelled, and as every night he would ask Naruto to stop being creepy. Yet, the blond stayed on his side. It was lonely all alone like that. Sasuke was starting to get dependent on the soft body as a sleeping aid.

He gathered up his courage, and reached his hand out only to rest it on Naruto's arm. Naruto cringed away.

"I heard-"

"Please don't say anything if it's going to only be lies."

"I heard Kisame was cheating on Itachi, so I followed him tonight," he admitted, readying him to get chastised.

"Heard?" Naruto spoke, his tone someone harsh.

"I had done a little investigating earlier."

"And you are not doing this to protect Itachi, right?"

"He is not cheating. He just likes to role play with Itachi, I guess."

"And if he had been cheating?"

"Nothing."

"You would use it to hurt your brother right. Show him that he failed at something."

"I hadn't planned that far."

"I see…"

"I don't appreciate your tone."

"Why the fuck would I care what you think of my tone?" Naruto suddenly rose in bed. "You hate your brother over something he said-"

"That's not just it!"

"Maybe you'll start hating me over something I say too. Maybe you'll try to hurt me too!"

"Everyday! Everyday we have to have this fucking conversation! It is no wonder you can't stay in a relationship. No one would stand you nitpicking and disapproving of everything they do. If I didn't have to stay married to you, I would have dumped you."

Naruto froze for a second before whispering, "I thought you were a decent guy, you know, regardless of how I always called you a bastard. I thought you were just using this brother thing to motivate yourself to get further in your career… I was wrong. You _are_ a bastard. To think I would have let you sleep with me."

"You would have?"

"Not anymore."

"Naruto," he sat on bed, poking the tanned back. "You have a birthmark on your back. I like it."

"Get away, seriously, get away. You want to have sex with me after what you have just said?!"

"I'm not after your pants. I just; you shouldn't cry."

"I'm not crying. I don't even care anymore. I told you; I've given up on you."

"I doubt that; you are relentless. You should, but I doubt you would."

"I already did."

"No you didn't."

"I did. And in fact, I won't care if you go down and have sex with any random guy who would take you."

"What does this have to do with anything?"

"I just want to show you that I think of this marriage as nothing more than a business deal, and of you as nothing more than a business partner I'm stuck with. You've lost the privilege of me caring about you."

"Whatever! Even if I wanted, I can't have sex with anyone else. The contract we signed-"

"I give you permission."

"Well, if you are only saying that because you expect the same favor in return, you are dead wrong. I have a family name to uphold."

"You know what I think of you family name?"

"What-" Sasuke paused ogling at the finger Naruto held up at him. "This is the third time today.

"It's after midnight so technically it's only the first of many today. This is the second!"

The raven glared at Naruto for what had been a whole minute before walking away.

The floor in the kitchen was slightly stony, and he had taken his shoes off earlier. He poked his tongue against the inside of his cheeks, trying to shake off the heavy unreadable feeling down at the pit of his stomach. He only knew one solution for this feeling. Cooking. Cooking calmed him down. Suddenly, he turned around, stomped into the bedroom, snatched the media player, and jolted back to the kitchen.

With the music thunderously flowing out of his headphones, he began to move on rhythm. He ducked down pulling a pan, and then tossed it on the stove. He dropped the butter in and rolled his hips first towards the fridge. The onions and greens were smacked across the cutting before he began to chop them on rhythm, and then into the pan. He turned to the kitchen machine, and dropped in the next set of ingredients, and turned on.

He really liked that song.

"Sasuke!"

The raven froze suddenly, looking at Naruto standing in front of him.

"I've been calling your name for an hour! It's six in the morning and you're demolishing the kitchen. The neighbors called!"

"Fuck them," Sasuke pushed him to the side, and continued to brisk the chickens.

Naruto looked apologetically at the window, forcing Sasuke to turn around. Iruka was standing with a frown on his face, next to Kakashi who was looking apologetically back at Naruto.

"What's wrong with you?" Naruto asked. "I thought you were the composed one out of the two of us. Psychotic but composed. And what's with all the food?"

"For you," Sasuke stated. "Sit down."

"You want me to eat stuffed chicken for breakfast?"

"It's heavenly."

"I thought you were angry at me."

"Does it make you feel bad that someone who is angry at you is bribing you with food just to calm you down and stop you from irritating the fuck out of them?"

"No," Naruto stated.

Sasuke gritted his teeth. "Eat," he dropped a plate in front of Naruto.

"Is it poisoned?" Naruto laughed nervously, but it wasn't past Sasuke, was it? The man wanted to ruin his brother's marriage.

"If I wanted to kill you, I would choose stabbing."

"Ooookay," Naruto gulped. "I guess this means it is not poisoned."

He began to poke the food with his fork, before taking a bite. "Tasty!"

Sasuke sat beside him, glaring at him. "You make me so angry."

"You make me angry too."

"You make me so angry," Sasuke repeated.

The blond swallowed, before reaching of the knife in front of Sasuke and pulling it away. "They always suspect the husband first. Remember that."

"Why are you so intent on making me hate myself?"

"I don't want you to hate yourself."

"Yes, you keep trying to make me feel like the bad guy."

"You are not a bad guy. You just do bad things constantly and try to justify it to yourself by ridicules reasons. And you know what? Even if your reasons were valid and your brother is the devil incarnated, harming him would still make you just like him."

Sasuke glared at the other man, almost wanting to shove his face into the chicken. "I hate you."

"Because I'm saying something you don't want to hear. I bet you hate your conscious too."

"He hurt me."

"Then work on healing yourself, not hurting him back."

"What if I need to hurt him to heal?"

"What if you need to forgive him to heal?"

"That's is not possible," Sasuke fell silent, before feeling Naruto's warm hand cupping his cheek.

"Teme, you know…"

"Know what?" Sasuke whispered.

"If your goal at opening your shop was something good like chasing after your dream-"

"It is."

"If it was something good like trying to be everything you can, I would give everything to support you; fake husband or real. I'd be behind you one hundred percent," he smiled at Sasuke. "And just know that, if what you say is true and Itachi tries to hurt you again, he has me to deal with. And I might look all talk, but I never let anyone hurt my friends or the ones I care about."

"Like Jiraiya…" Sasuke looked down at the table. It was true; Naruto did seem to go the extra mile for his friends and loved ones. "Do you consider me someone you care about it?"

"You're my husband. Even three years from now, after a bitter divorce, I'll still care about you. Most people grow up tied to the ones they love with blood, but I didn't have that. So I had to find something greater and deeper than blood. I might be an orphan but somehow I have a bigger family than anyone who is not. You are a part of this family whether you like it or not, and regardless of how many times I shout at you that I'll stop caring."

The raven stared back at Naruto, right in his eyes. He leaned his face against the hand cupping it, and kissing it softly, before Naruto pulled it away in shook. He griped the hand, still staring at Naruto, and leaned forward.

"You said we can't-" Naruto's voice shook, but it was quickly and sweetly interrupted by a soft peck on the lips. "W-what was that?"

"Can't I kiss my husband?"

"You said-"

Sasuke rested his forehead against Naruto's silencing him. "I'd like it if you'd helped me with my store."

"Does this mean…" Naruto's words faded. Saying it out loud would trouble someone with Sasuke's ego. "Kiss me again."

**- To be continued- **

**Pssst... I heard Sasuke is visiting Naruto in Icha Icha soon and things might get steamy. Sh! Don't tell anyone. Just review. **


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